"Because you need me to"

I'm doing pretty good. Thank you for acting like you care. I'm glad you're good too... I'm not venturing too far, Not asking many questions. There are somethings I'd much rather not know. Would like to think that you remember me sometimes, Don't want to think otherwise. Don't want to know if you've got someone new. Hate the thought of you touching someone else. It's out of order for me to feel like this. If I could change it then I would. But I just don't know how to. Thank you for acting like you've forgiven me. I can't stand it when you're angry at me, Even if I think you've being pathetic. I hate that I give you an excuse to get pissed off. I don't want to be that girl. It's good I stopped when I did. Didn't tell you about my dream last night. I shouldn't still dream about you, I know. In my dream, it was how it was before, and it was perfect again. But, you got annoyed again. Left me again, Crying again. I asked you why, and all you said was "Because you need me to" and then you went. It was horrible. The second time I can remember a dream where you've been here, been amazing, yet gone as quickly as you arrived. It kind of freaks me out. Makes me sad when I realise that in my dreams I can't remember you properly, your laugh was all wrong. Your teeth weren't right. Your hair wasn't even the right colour. I'm losing hold of the little things that make you you. I don't think I want them back because I don't see how that would possibly make it any easier. Have realised for a long time that I simply cannot win, because I know I'm going to miss you, always going to want you to text me, be over the fucking moon when you ring me... but also, that stuff doesn't really help me get over you. I still want to see you. I'll always be happy to kiss you. Promise I'll never get sad.

I don't know how to get out of this. I'm so sick of it.