This wasn't part of the plan.

I spent an hour reading our message history and then I deleted it.
I hate you. I hate everything about you. But blatently the thing I hate most about you is how much I fucking love you and how much I fucking want to be with you even though you've broken my heart. I fucking hate how I just want one more chance to prove this could be good. I hate how I'm never going to be able to get that second chance. I hate how I'm let down, betrayed, upset. I hate you you promised me you'd never hurt me. I hate how I was naive. I hate that I can't think of a time in the immediate future when I'm going to be able to trust a guy again, it seems however perfect you lot seem on the outside you're always capable of so much heart break. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.

I'm making baby steps away from you. Sometimes I fall, but I'll always get back up again.



Thank god it's weekend.
I can get drunk and party this weekend.

I'm emotionally shattered I think.
Don't get me wrong, he is a minor glitch in my current life. Excuse him from the equation and life is pretty sweet, even if school is shattering, some of my friends are amazing.

My physics teacher called my dad today to discuss me, apparently he said dead nice stuff about me. I'm chuffed. I well love my physics teacher, he's actually ace. The only reason I don't want to do physics next year is because I think that nothing will ever compare to his amazing lessons, like the ones where he starts a proper lesson but we get distracted and talk about interesting degree-level stuff like the universe or like we did today, search on google earth.



I'm going to bed.